What Causes Sexual Addiction

Different factors trigger sexual addiction, otherwise known as sexual dependency or sexual compulsivity. The obsession to sexually compulsive behaviors is a complex subject and can hardly be attributed to a single cause. Sexual addiction is more likely a build up of conditions over time, such as early sexualization or early exposure of an individual to inappropriate sexual material or behavior, or traumatic experiences during childhood, physical and/or sexual abuse, abandonment, or emotional trauma.

Generally, the causes of sexual addiction may be classified into three: biological, psychological, and spiritual.

Biologically, a biochemical imbalance in the brain, affecting the pleasure and reward pathways, may trigger sexual addiction. Studies show that food, abused drugs and sexual interests share a common pathway within the brains’ survival and reward systems. The biological addict may have conditioned his brain that having illicit sex is good the same way that food is good when he is hungry. Sex activates the natural opioids and dopamine that produce intense pleasure and euphoria accentuating the addiction. Some drugs have also been found to cause hypersexuality. Examples are apomorphine and dopamine replacement therapy. This may explain why even competent, intelligent and goal-directed people can be so equally obsessed with indulging in sexual fantasy and seeking a sexual “fix.”

Psychologically, sexual addiction has become the means to escape physical, emotional or sexual abuse. Most of reported sex addicts account their condition to these psychological causes. Emotionally for the sex addicts, sex is not really about sex but a vehicle to provide an illusion of affirmation, a veneer of control and connection in a safe environment. The sexual “fix” has become the source of pleasure and avoids unpleasant feelings, a coping mechanism to fight stress, work difficulties, interpersonal psychological and emotional problems. Studies reveal that most sex addicts come from dysfunctional families. The findings of one study show that 72% of sex addicts had been physically abused in childhood, 81% had been sexually abused, and 97% emotionally abused. Patrick Carnes’ research also indicates that 87% of the families of sex addicts included more than one addict in the home and a majority of them grew up in rigid family system, disengaged family system and both rigid and disengaged family systems. This study implies that a lot of sexual addicts come from families where their emotional needs were not met.

Spiritually, sexual addiction feeds the delusion that fulfilling comfort, love and security can be experienced on a strictly human level apart from God. The addiction is the spirituality that comforts the sex addict, celebrates with him/her and is always available and present.

These causes usually overlap, present and manifested by one sex addict. This is why treatment of a sexual addict entails much effort and support not only from the individual but also his/her loved ones. Support and encouragement from 12 step groups and a recovery community, group therapy, and even family and friends all contribute to the treatment of the sex addict and assist the healing process.

As discussed, the symptoms of sexual addiction might not be easily decoded unless its effects subsequently appeared to be destroying the addict’s individual life. But how do we determine if a sexual act is still considered as normal to being abnormal, unhealthy or already destructive? There are list of behavioural patterns that indicate sexual addiction. This is important so the addict himself or his family will be able to accept and deal with the addiction.

First is the Out-of-control sexual behavior. The acts associated with sexual addiction such as exhibitionism, prostitution, indulging in pornography, voyeurism, sexual harassment, multiple and anonymous sexual partners, once transformed into a habit might be uncontrollable as the addict himself ventures to some other acts to increase his pleasure. This might be committed regardless of the place or the partner. The intensity arises if the addict considers it as an exploration or risk which he can get away with later on.

Second is the inability to stop the sexual behavior knowing its severe consequences. The addiction overpowers the person and he continues to satisfy his sexual desire notwithstanding its consequences believing that he can deal with it. This includes health and legal risks, marital or relationship problems, unwanted pregnancies, loss of job opportunity and others.

Third would be the persistent pursuit of self-destructive behavior and an attitude that says “I’ll deal with the consequences when they come”. But in reality, when the consequences come, the addict is in a position where he cannot redeem himself due to shame, low self-esteem, hopelessness, intense anxiety, self-hatred and moral conflict.

Fourth is the ongoing desire or effort to limit sexual behavior. When the addict later realizes of the disorder and knowing that the addiction is inherently wrong, the addict tries to escape this situation by shifting his attention to some other things. He could splurge on material things, move from one place to another, get married or enter into a new relationship. He believes that this will at least distract or diminish his acts.

Fifth is sexual obsession and fantasy as a primary coping strategy. Every addiction started with the simplest act of purchasing pornographic materials. Later on, its frequency and the search for some level of pleasure aggravate the addiction. The addict becomes dissatisfied with the sexual fantasy and would want to commit overt acts for some real pleasure.

Sixth is regularly increasing the amount of sexual experience because the current level of activity is no longer sufficiently satisfying. As the addict becomes discontented of a particular sexual act, he tends to increase the sexual experience to gain more satisfaction. For example, from a monogamous relationship, he tries two, three or more sexual relationships which also increase the possibility of the acquisition of HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases.

Seventh is the severe mood changes related to sexual activity. The addict does not develop any emotional attachment to any of his partners as he engages himself to multiple risky sexual activities. This causes his mood to be altered from time to time. The addict feels the conflict and inconsistency of his emotions which he cannot control.

Eighth is the inordinate amount of time spent obtaining sex, being sexual and recovering from sexual experiences. An addict is spending more time in engaging himself in sexual activities rather than keeping himself productive from work and society as a whole. The addiction can also be rooted from previous sexual abuses that the addict might have experienced.

Last is the neglect of important social occupational or recreation activities because of sexual behavior. The addict already isolated himself from the society and might have set aside the more important and pressing matters that is more helpful to his self-development. The steps to recovery are acceptance not just by the addict but by his family, professional help and the involvement of the person to his society as a refurbished individual.